Without You
by yamadayui9871
Summary: Sakura is 17 when she concludes that she did not love Sasuke. Sasuke is 17 when he concludes that he did not hate Sakura. Neither of them expected to feel this way, but there is nothing they can do to stop it. Sasuke returns to Konoha with high hopes and finds Sakura with someone else and realizes he's nothing without her. Sasusaku and slight Nejisaku


Haruno Sakura is 17 when she concludes that she did not love Uchiha Sasuke. Lying in bed one night, she discovered that her heart no longer hurt when Sasuke was mentioned. She should've been relieved; it would mean her getting rid of weakness and no longer feeling hurt, betrayed and humiliated for baring her heart for a boy who didn't think twice before knocking her out. But the more Sakura dwelled on this, the more she came to realize that perhaps, she never did love Uchiha Sasuke to begin with. Not truly love, anyway. What she felt for Sasuke was purely a twelve year old girl pining for a handsome face- a trophy she competed against Ino for. Although she admitted that she genuinely cares for the Uchiha's well-being, never did she have concerns for his emotional state. She never bothered to question why Sasuke was so dark and distrusting or what he meant when he stated his goal to kill a certain man. It was not love she felt for him. She was infatuated with him and hypnotized by his charming looks. Nothing more than a childhood crush, she believed. In addition to that, Sakura has matured and understood the concept that love does not go in one direction. It cannot be one chasing after another who did not return the feelings. It has to go in both directions, and in no way was there one moment where Sasuke returned her feelings. Sakura therefore decides that she did not love Sasuke- that she never did. As she turns over and pulls the sheets closer to her chest, she cannot ignore the terrible hollowness that she refuses to admit is guilt she feels in her heart because she then knew that in a way, without her knowing it, Sasuke was right when he said he was alone in this world.

Uchiha Sasuke is 17 when he concludes that he did not hate Haruno Sakura. Lying in the cold bed of Orochimaru's lair, he cannot help but succumb to the fact that his heart ached when he thinks of her. He should've been disgusted; it would mean that he was still the weakling his brother said he was and that he had not cut all ties with Konoha. Despite all the times he called her annoying and treated her with the utmost disrespect, Sasuke decides that it was because he didn't know any other way to treat someone. After the massacre of his family, he could not let himself trust or rely on anyone. But when the smiling, pink-haired girl's eyes softened and spoke gently with a voice of honey to him, he knows nothing but to spare himself of the pain of caring for someone again. Her presence bought out a warm, bubbly feeling in his chest; a feeling he was so not familiar with. He unconsciously looked out for her on missions and secretly liked it when Sakura's hand brushed against his when she asked him if he wanted to eat lunch with her. He pushes her away- to protect her, he tells himself. Itachi was still out there, there is no telling if he would harm her. But he knew in his heart that it was a huge lie. He was protecting himself from ever getting hurt again. As he turns over, the coldness, the despair of the place seeps into his skin, and he allows his heart wonder what his life could've been like if he forgot revenge and stayed with Sakura in Konoha five years ago.

Memories of _that night _plague Sakura's mind. She thinks that aside from the offers of going with him and promises of making him happy should he stay, there was an unspoken promise in the air that night. That no matter what he's done or how long he's been gone, she'd be waiting for him when he came home. And true enough, Sakura could not deny that Sasuke was on her mind every time she refused a date from a promising young man. But as Sakura stands in front of her mirror, scantily dressed in just her underwear, she decides that there is no need to keep such a foolish promise. Twelve year old Sakura did not know how hard it is to wait for years or the cruel things Sasuke was capable of doing. She is not a child anymore; she cannot keep clinging onto long abandoned bonds and fragile hopes of him returning. She needs to move on. After all, she never did love him, right? Why should she have to sacrifice anything for him anymore, after all the tears she wasted on him? Why should she wait for a man who's never coming back? Sakura turns her head side to side, intelligent green eyes scanning her body. Her hair grew out and her face slimmed in the years Sasuke was gone. Her eyes were bigger, brighter; people say her eyes could enchant anyone she tried to. Her skin was still creamy white and unscarred despite her hard life due to her impressive healing skills, but her toned arms, stomach and legs let everyone know that she was a kunoichi-and a powerful one too. Sakura is down to earth enough to know that she is beautiful and that there are plenty of men out there willing to snag a beautiful, smart and powerful woman. It really is a pity that she wasted all those years waiting for Sasuke. Sakura spontaneously takes hold of the tight, emerald green dress Ino got her but never dared to wear. Putting the image of an onyx eyed, dark haired boy who lost everything he ever had out of her mind, Sakura decides that next time she is asked out on a date, she just might say yes.

"Haruno-san, there is a patient waiting for you in room 107." These words are tossed over Nurse Asuka's shoulders as she makes eye contact with the pink-haired medic, did a double take and backtracked. "Wow, Haruno-san, you really outdid yourself today. What's the occasion for such a pretty getup?" Sakura just laughs and replies, "Thank you, Asuka-san! There's no occasion, I thought I'd just be good to myself and feel pretty for one day." Asuka shakes her head with a soft smile, "Don't you know, Haruno-san? You're already pretty every day with or without the make-up and dress" Sakura waves her away heartily as she walks towards Room 107. "Always with the flattery, I see. I'll catch you later, Asuka-san!" Sakura barely sees Asuka wave her hand before she closes the door behind her. "Alright then, let's get started." Sakura turns around to see Hyuuga Neji sitting on the bed. "Neji-kun! What a surprise! I thought you were on a mission." He smiled grimly in pain, "I just came back from said mission. I have an ugly bruise on my abdomen Lee insisted I come in to get healed for." His pale eyes looked up and down her body and Sakura couldn't help but feel a bit warm. "You look lovely today, Sakura" His usually blank eyes are always caring and sweet whenever he was with her, Sakura noted. After Sasuke's leave, Neji has been dropping hints of his interest; elongating their contact whenever he touched her, looking for excuses to be alone with her and giving gentle compliments like this. Sakura has always blocked his advances for her unspoken promise, but now that she's decided to disregard the promise, she might as well accept his compliments. She smiles warmly and even allows herself to blush before answering, "Thank you, Neji-kun. You too, look very handsome as always." That was the undeniable truth. With his special bloodline trait, pale skin, dark hair and masculine body, Sakura knows Neji is the type she liked. Her infatuations with Sasuke was the proof of that. But unlike Sasuke, Neji did not betray Konoha, ignore and push Sakura away. He was in fact just the opposite. She feels as if his pale eyes could see right through her, but that he was as equally honest as well. He is sweet, caring and all Sakura wants. With Neji, she could build a healthy relationship. That is why, when Neji asks her out to dinner with a hint of nervousness that she never sees in the Hyuuga, she accepts with high hopes of a new beginning for Haruno Sakura.

They've been dating for over a year. As Sakura hoped, Neji became her steady rock in the unstable world of the ninja life. She finally had someone to come home to, someone who was waiting for _her_. Someone she could share her thoughts with, someone to hold her and make her laugh. For Sakura, love was finally going in both directions. Yet, when Neji thrusts into her one last time panting, she cannot feel the light kisses he makes on her neck and she cannot hear the soft murmurings of love against her ear. She loves Neji, but she feels empty. She has the love she's always wanted, but she wonders if this is all love has to offer.


End file.
